The Best of Me Quotes by David Sedaris

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Glen’s Homophobia Newsletter Vol. 3, No. 2

“It costs to gather data, to Xerox, to staple and mail, let alone the cost of my personal time and energies. “

“At the register this Drew fellow rang up the items and said, ‘I’ll bet you’re going home to grill you some chicken. “

“Regular readers of Glen’s Homophobia Newsletter know that I, Glen, honor truth and hold it above all other things. The truth, be it ugly or naked, does not frighten me. The meaner the truth, the harder I, Glen, stare it down. “

“Like those hateful trees in The Wizard of Oz. Those mean trees that threw the apples. he said. Did any of them hit you. he asked, concerned. A few. Ouch! Then what. “

“I urge all my readers to BOYCOTT DAVE’S KWIK STOP. I urge you to phone Drew Pierson anytime day or night and tell him you dreamt you were sitting on his face. “

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Front Row Center with Thaddeus Bristol

“Bad movies, unforgivable television, and even worse theater. I’m talking bone-crushing theater, the type our ancient ancestors used to oppress their enemies before the invention of the stretching rack. “

“These hopeless amateurs pranced and gamboled across our local stages, hiding behind their youth and begging, practically demanding, we forgive their egregious mistakes. “

Christmas Means Giving

“The Cottinghams were trouble from the very first moment they moved in next door. Doug, Nancy, and their unattractive eight-year-old daughter, Eileen, were exceedingly envious and greedy people. “

“I dwelled upon the incident for a day or two and then turned my attention toward the approaching holidays. “

“When Beth asked who was at the door I called out, ‘Code Blue,’ which was our secret signal that one of us should release the hounds. We had two of them back then, big Dobermans named Butterscotch and Mr. Lewis. “

“First we videotaped him eating a palmful of leftover stuffing and then I had Beth snap a picture as I handed the geezer a VCR. “

“Where are those supergenerous people with that delightful Christmas card. , someone would ask, and the host would point in our direction while the Cottinghams bitterly gritted their teeth. “

“There would be other Christmases, but I think Beth and I both knew that this one was special. “

The Incomplete Quad

“I spent my high-school years staring at the pine trees outside my classroom window and picturing myself on the campus of an Ivy League university, where my wealthy roommate Colgate would leave me notes reading, ‘Meet me on the quad at five. “

“The hookah’s over on the shelf, they’d say. Right next to the rectal suppositories. “

“We quit going to the cafeteria, preferring to cook our meals in the dormitory kitchen, the butter dripping off our chins. We moved on to bookstores and record shops, guaranteed that no one would say, ‘I think I see that crippled girl stealing the new Joni Mitchell album. “

“She didn’t ask for a fork, I said. She asked for your watch. “

“Good for you, I said. This is going to be the best thing you’ve ever done. “

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Girl Crazy

“Don’t be fooled or intimidated by the right wing’s proposed boycotts. For every rabid fundamentalist, there are ten free-thinking progressives whose viewing habits cannot be altered by fear and hatred. “

“If you move in favor of the slut, allow me to suggest my former wife as a template. Is that the right word. I mean that if Ellen wants to be a slutty lesbian, you can base her character on my former wife—all she does is tell lies and slut around. “

How to Spend the Budget Surplus

“Since Washington is the capital of our country, shouldn’t its mall be world-class. “

You Can’t Kill the Rooster

“When I was young, my father was transferred and our family moved from western New York State to Raleigh, North Carolina. IBM had relocated a great many northerners, and together we made relentless fun of our new neighbors and their poky, backward way of life. “

“My mother was, for the most part, delighted with my brother and regarded him with the bemused curiosity of a brood hen discovering she has hatched a completely different species. “

“Some motherfucker told me to get the fuck out of his motherfucking face, so I said, ‘Fuck off, fuckface. “

“My brother fell into the floor-sanding business. It’s hard work, but he enjoys the satisfaction that comes with a well-finished rec room. “

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Me Talk Pretty One Day

“I’ve moved to Paris with hopes of learning the language. My school is an easy ten-minute walk from my apartment, and on the first day of class I arrived early, watching as the returning students greeted one another in the school lobby. “

“While the optimist struggled to defend herself, I scrambled to think of an answer to what had obviously become a trick question. How often is one asked what he loves in this world. More to the point, how often is one asked and then publicly ridiculed for his answer. “

“We soon learned to dodge chalk and protect our heads and stomachs whenever she approached us with a question. “

“Every day spent with you is like having a cesarean section. “

Jesus Shaves

“And what does one do on the fourteenth of July. Does one celebrate Bastille Day. “

“It just didn’t add up. “

“So why stop there. If I could believe in myself, why not give other improbabilities the benefit of the doubt. “

Dog Days

“Every dog is man’s best friend. “

Us and Them

“I could if I wanted to. It just wasn’t the right time. “

“Because they had no TV, the Tomkeys were forced to talk during dinner. They had no idea how puny their lives were, and so they were not ashamed that a camera would have found them uninteresting. “

“Actually, we have a trailer, so what we do is back it into the lake. “

“What the hell are you doing. my mother whispered, but my mouth was too full to answer. I’ll just be a moment, she called, and as she closed the door behind her and moved toward my bed, I began breaking the wax lips and candy necklaces pulled from pile no. “

“I had protected and watched over these people, but now, with one stupid act, they had turned my pity into something hard and ugly. “

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Let It Snow

“What little snow there was would usually melt an hour or two after hitting the ground, and there you’d be in your windbreaker and unconvincing mittens, forming a lumpy figure made mostly of mud. “

“When we asked her to lie in the middle of the street, her only question was Where. “

The Ship Shape

“People talk about Raleigh, but it isn’t really true, is it. “

“Now that’s a sign, our father would say, and we would agree. “

“While at the beach we sensed more than ever that our lives were governed by luck. “

“It’s perfect, my father said. A real beauty, just like your mother here. He came from behind and pinched her on the bottom. She laughed and swatted him with a towel, and we witnessed what we would later come to recognize as the rejuvenating power of real estate. “

“The TV Antenna, my sister Tiffany said. The Telephone Pole. The Toothless Black Man Selling Shrimp from the Back of His Van. I mean, my God, how depressing can you get. “

“We had no legitimate claim to self-pity, were ineligible even to hold a grudge, but that didn’t stop us from complaining. “

The Girl Next Door

“So this girl, my mother continued—and I knew what she would ask before she even said it. What does her father do. “

“It was, I thought, the least I could do. “

“What is this. A skit from Hee Haw. Who the hell are these people. These people, I said, are my neighbors, and I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t make fun of them. “

“I couldn’t believe I was having this conversation. How could you not know that Spain was a country. Even if you were nine years old, it seems you would have picked it up on TV or something. “

“They said it jokingly, but the answer was yes, that’s exactly what I thought would happen. The world would fall apart. “

“I considered myself an outsider in this neighborhood, something like a missionary among the savages, but standing there panting, my hair netted with cobwebs, I got the horrible feeling that I fit right in. “

“It wouldn’t have made any difference, my mother said. A woman like that, the way she sees it she’s a victim. Everyone’s against her, no matter what. “

“It’s not your money they’ll be after,, she said. It’s mine. . You mean Dad’s. I was smarting over the little creatures comment and wanted to hurt her, but it didn’t work. I mean our money, she said. “

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Repeat After Me

“Remember to turn off and unplug after use. “

“It was a normal-enough life for a twenty-one-year-old, but being a dropout was not what she had planned for herself. “

“While I accepted my lowered expectations, Lisa fought hard to regain her former title. “

“So now we have to be in a movie. Lisa said, picking her sneakers off the floor and tossing them into the laundry room. Well, I can tell you right now that you are not dragging my bird into this. “

“It’s a delusion much harder to maintain when a family member is actually in the audience. “

“According to Gretchen, the turtles had no memories of their former limbs, but Lisa wasn’t buying it. “

“One time, one time I was out driving. “

“If you ever, ever repeat that story, I will never talk to you again. “

“What if the director got me and my family wrong. But now a worse thought occurred to me: What if he got us right. “

Six to Eight Black Men

“When do you open your Christmas presents. “

“Unlike the jolly, obese American Santa, Saint Nicholas is painfully thin and dresses not unlike the pope, topping his robes with a tall hat resembling an embroidered tea cozy. The outfit, I was told, is a carryover from his former career, when he served as the bishop of Turkey. “

“While a certain segment of our population might be perfectly happy with the arrangement, if you told the average white American that six to eight nameless black men would be sneaking into his house in the middle of the night, he would barricade the doors and arm himself with whatever he could get his hands on. “

“We don’t know for sure, but in pinning that license to his chest, he inspires the sort of narrative that ultimately makes me proud to be an American. “

Possession

“Finding an apartment is a lot like falling in love, the real estate agent told us. You fall in love with the idea of the place, not the place itself. “

“If finding an apartment is like falling in love, buying one is like proposing on your first date and agreeing not to see each other until the wedding. “

“A single Anne Frank moves us more than the countless others who suffered just as she did but whose faces have remained in the shadows. Perhaps it is better that way. If we were capable of taking in all the suffering of all those people, we would not be able to live. “

Nuit of the Living Dead

“But wait, I’m told. “

“I used to lie awake for hours, but now, if Hugh’s gone for the night, I’ll just stay up and keep myself busy: writing letters, cleaning the oven, replacing missing buttons. “

“I can live with this, he seemed to be saying. Really. Just give me a chance. “

“Do you speak English. I asked. He speaks English! The news was greeted with a great deal of excitement and then translated for one of the women, who apparently did not understand the significance. “

“It’s more of a summer home, the man said, and nodded. He was looking now at the fireplace, which was slightly taller than he was. I tend to see only the solid stone hearth and high oak mantel, but he was examining the meat hooks hanging from the clotted black interior. “

“If you have any problems, you know where I live, I said. You and your friends can spend the night here if you like. Really, I mean it. I have plenty of beds. “

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Solution to Saturday’s Puzzle

“I’m surprised the force didn’t wake her—that’s how hard it hit—but all she did was flutter her eyelids and let out a tiny sigh, the kind you might hear from a baby. “

“When our departure was announced, the woman returned to her seat but hovered a half foot off the cushion so she could continue her conversation with the man she’d been talking to earlier. “

“It’s pathetic how much significance I attach to the Times puzzle, which is easy on Monday and gets progressively harder as the week advances. I’ll spend fourteen hours finishing the Friday, and then I’ll wave it in someone’s face and demand that he acknowledge my superior intelligence. “

“I looked at her then, and thought, No. If she’d had so much as a stomachache, she would have mentioned it. “

The Understudy

“With a regular teenage babysitter, you horsed around, jumped her on her way out of the bathroom, that sort of thing, but with Mrs. Robbins and Mrs. Byrd we were respectful and well behaved, not like ourselves at all. “

“I smelled trouble the moment her car pulled up, a piece of junk driven by a guy with no shirt on. He looked just old enough to start shaving, and remained seated as the figure beside him pushed open the door and eased her way out. This was Mrs. “

“You tell Curtis for me that if he don’t run Tanya to R. C. ‘s hearing, he’ll have to answer to both me and Gene Junior, and that’s no lie. “

“First rule is that nobody touches nothing, not nobody and not for no reason. “

“She [Mrs. Peacock] was clearly trying to be a good hostess, but I wished she would stop. “

“I guess I expected a violent showdown. How else to explain my disappointment when, instead of slapping Mrs. Peacock across the face, my mother looked her in the eye, and said, ‘Oh, come on. I don’t believe that for a minute. “

Town and Country

“David, he said. David, listen to me when I am talking to you. I asked do you like the dick. “

“I just work, I told him. I work, and then I go home, and then I work some more. “

“The magazine was devoted to two major stories—photo essays, I guess you could call them. The first involved a female cyclist who stops to rest beside an abandoned windmill and seduces what the captions refer to as a stray collie. “

In the Waiting Room

“D’accord, I told the concierge, and the next thing I knew I was sewing the eye onto a stuffed animal belonging to her granddaughter. “

“It’s embarrassing, but, given the way I normally eat, it would probably go down fairly easily, strap and all. “

“It sometimes helps to remind myself that not everyone is like me. Not everyone writes things down in a notebook and then transcribes them into a diary. “

“In America, if someone dropped to the ground, you’d call an ambulance, but in France it’s the firemen who do most of the rescuing. “

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Undecided

“For as long as I can remember, just as we move into the final weeks of the presidential campaign, the focus shifts to the undecided voters. “

“When doubting that anyone could not know whom they’re voting for, I inevitably think back to November 1968. “

“When my father told me that I was holding my fork wrong, my mother would say that I was holding it right, or right in ‘certain circles. “

The Cat and the Baboon

“It’s good to have a clean anus. Why, I lick mine at least five times a day. “

“On a cat it’s. . classy. There’s a grace to it, but a dog, you know the way they hunker over, legs going every which way. “

The Motherless Bear

“Faster, called a soldier at the front of the crowd, and the boy quickened his beat. The male bear struggled to keep up, and when he tripped over the hem of his skirt, the man pulled out a stick and beat him across the face until his nose bled. “

“Most animals can’t make out a word I’m saying, and you know why. the chained male told her. It’s because I have no teeth. “

The Faithful Setter

“They are too your children, she’d said, referring to her last litter, a party of four that looked no more like me than that dick of a raccoon. I knew they were fathered by the English bull terrier across the street, but what are you going to do. “

“It was right about then, my wife wanting her boyfriend back and me entertaining these insane, dark thoughts, that the bandaged girl reappeared. “

“I didn’t have to ask at all for round three, and the one after that just seemed to happen on its own. ‘An aftershock,’ the female called it. Some might define this as cheating, but I just call it being thorough. “

“Among other things, I like the fact that my wife needs me. “

Dentists Without Borders

“I don’t know where these people get their ideas, but my experiences in France, where I’ve lived off and on for the past thirteen years, have all been good. “

“If my French physician is a little disappointing, my French periodontist more than makes up for it. “

“My four false incisors are connected to form a single unit and were secured into place with an actual screwdriver. Because the teeth affect one’s bite, the positioning has to be exact, so my dentist would put them in and then remove them to make minor adjustments. “

“But after that’s done I’ll still need to come regularly, won’t I. “

Memory Laps

“I always told myself that when I hit fifty I was going to discover opera, not just casually but full force: studying the composers, learning Italian, maybe even buying a cape. “

“If I had been trying to get out of school, she’d have at least allowed me to plead my case, but then she had no presence at school. “

“I wanted to tell her, but more than that I wanted her to notice it on her own. How can you not. “

“I lowered the doll back out the window and let go of the towel. The car behind us honked, and I ducked down low and gave the driver the finger. “

“Everything you touch turns to crap. “

“When I told him I’d started swimming again, my dad said, ‘Attaboy. “

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Think Differenter

“I, personally, don’t know any blind people, though the guy I used to buy my newspapers from had pretty bad cataracts. “

“When the first iPod came out, I recall thinking that it would never last. Isn’t that funny. “

Loggerheads

“Just like in the time before glasses! you think. “

“While they welcomed male company, I shrank from it, dreaded it, feeling like someone forever trying to pass, someone who would eventually be found out, and expelled from polite society. “

“It was the start of the sixth grade, and the water was too chilly to swim in. On the Sunday we were to head back home, Shaun and I got up at dawn and took a walk with our nets. “

“Since the death of a traumatized mole pried from the mouth of our cat, Samantha, my aquarium had sat empty and was therefore ready for some new tenants. “

“It wasn’t much to look at, our public library. “

“If I were to go to a game today, I’d certainly find something to enjoy: the food, the noise, the fans marked up with paint. It would be an experience. “

“After informing me that his father’s heart had stopped beating, he never said another word about him. “

If I Ruled the World

“If I ruled the world, the first thing I’d do is concede all power to the real King, who, in case you don’t happen to know, is named Jesus Christ. A lot of people have managed to forget this lately, so the second thing I’d do is remind them of it. “

“And all the other evil people and whores and liars who want to take away our freedom or raise my taxes, they shall know our fury, Jesus’s and mine, and burn forever. “

Easy, Tiger

“Normally, when landing in a foreign country, I’m prepared to say, at the very least, Hello, and I’m sorry. “

“The only ones that stuck were Kaiserschnitt, which means cesarean section, and Lebensabschnittspartner. “

“In Japanese and Italian, the response to the final question is I’m fine, and you. In German it’s answered with a sigh and a slight pause, followed by Not so good. “

“Unlike the nameless instructor in Pimsleur, Herr Thomas explains things—the fact, for example, that if there are two verbs in a German sentence, one of them comes at the end. “

Laugh, Kookaburra

“No matter, he told me. In order to see the country, you have to see the countryside, and you’ve only been to Sydney. “

“One burner represents your family, one is your friends, the third is your health, and the fourth is your work. “

“The spas are fantastic, Pat said, and she parked the car in front of a puppet shop. “

“It’s one o’clock in the morning, for God’s sake. David, get to your room. “

“I knew that it was at best ten thirty. Still, though, there was no point in arguing. Down in the basement, I went to my room and he resumed his position in front of the TV. “

“I thought of this as the kookaburra, finally full, swallowed his last strip of duck meat, and took off over the lake. Inside the restaurant, our first courses had arrived, and I watched through the window as Hugh and Pat considered their plates. “

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Just a Quick E-mail

“It’s no severed spinal cord, of course, but like Dr. Gaffney says, the ball is in your court now. Either you can live in the past as a lonely, bitter paraplegic, or you can live in the present as one. “

“In other news, did you get the postcard I sent from our honeymoon. Iraq was beautiful, just as I imagined it would be, but there were so many Americans there! I said to Philip, Is nowhere safe. I mean, really. “

A Guy Walks into a Bar Car

“It sounds all right in passing, romantic even—the bar on the Lake Shore Limited—but in fact it was rather depressing. “

“It must have been he who started the conversation, as I’d never have had the nerve. “

“What do you have when you have nuts on your chest. He waited a beat. Chestnuts! What do you have when you have nuts on your chin. He looked from face to face. “

“The idea of holing up in a bathroom, of hogging the whole thing just so that you can hang out with someone who will never, under any circumstances, return your interest, makes me cringe. “

“I suppose the guard could have made some trouble—confiscated our dope, had us arrested at the next stop—but instead he just told us to take a hike, no easy feat on a train. “

“It was as if you had coaxed the eyes out of Bambi and resettled them, half asleep, into a human face. Nothing hard or ruined-looking there; in fact it was just the opposite—angelic, you might call him, pretty. “

“It’s silly how often, and how tenderly, I think of him. All the way to Penn Station, hungover from my night with Johnny Ryan, I wondered what might have happened had I taken Bashir up on his offer. “

Standing By

“It was one of those headaches that befall every airline passenger. A flight is delayed because of thunderstorms or backed-up traffic—or maybe it’s canceled altogether. Maybe you board two hours late, or maybe you board on time and spend the next two hours sitting on the runway. “

“The only ones having babies are the ones who shouldn’t be having them. “

“It’s sort of like time travel. One minute you’re bending to unlace your shoes, and the next thing you know you’re paying fourteen dollars for a fruit cup, wondering, How did I get here. “

“It’s a goddamn mess is what it is. “

Understanding Understanding Owls

“There’s something about nocturnal birds of prey that I just don’t get. If only there was somewhere I could turn for answers. “

“Most of the owls I saw in Great Britain had been stuffed during the Victorian era. “

“Eventually we’ll celebrate by spaying a few dozen kittens, but until that day comes, I want that throat. “

“It was my grandfather who mummified it, the taxidermist said. You can see it’s not the best job in the world, but it’s really rather good for a first attempt. “

“The head of this teenage girl,, the taxidermist said, for she’d been no older than fourteen at the time of her death. “

“At our first stop, a teenage girl in a school uniform got on and took the spot across from me. “

Now We Are Five

“A person expects his parents to die. But a sibling. I felt I’d lost the identity I’d enjoyed since 1968, when my brother was born. “

“We got here and the deliverywoman was there with seven pounds of seafood, a sympathy gift sent by friends. ‘They’s slaw in there too,’ she said, handing over the bags. “

“Amy,I hope you’re doing well. I miss you a lot. Love,Your FriendsAmy,I hope you’re doing well. “

“A person’s life reduced to one lousy box. “

“The sale included the furniture, so I also made an inventory of the Barcaloungers and massive TVs I would eventually be getting rid of, along with the shell-patterned bedspreads and cushions with anchors on them. “

“I’d like to buy everything here just so I could kill it, I said. “

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A House Divided

“You really should have clapped. “

“It was interesting to see what we all did with our inheritance. Pragmatic Lisa put her check in the bank. Gretchen moved south and saw to some bills while Amy and Paul essentially spent their money on candy. “

“Since when, though, do they prescribe lithium and Klonopin for back pain. “

“I normally don’t believe in drinking coffee in the car. Most often, I spill more than I swallow, but without it I’d have fallen asleep and then had to revive myself once we reached the house. “

“When you’re in the state that my sister was in, and that most people are in when they take their own lives, you’re not thinking of anything beyond your own pain. “

“It’s silly, but after a while I started to panic, thinking, I guess, that we could die out there. In the cold. Looking for one of my houses. I was just condemning Lisa for not bringing her phone when I spotted the broken fishing rod tied to our railing. “

The Perfect Fit

“Most people would answer, ‘I’ll tell you why not!,’ but I like Kapital’s philosophy. I like their clothing as well, though I can’t say that it always likes me in return. “

“The main reason we asked Gretchen to join us is that she understands shopping. That is to say, she understands there is nothing but shopping—unlike our brother Paul or our sister Lisa, whose disinterest in buying things is downright masculine. “

“Besides, it’s not like everything we buy is for ourselves. I’ll be getting birthday presents for friends and all sorts of things for my godson. “

“I hate to tell you, a woman said after a show one night, but those culottes look terrible on you. “

“I loved the respect being a pediatrician brought me in Japan, even when I wore a smock and had a tower of three hats on my head. You could see it in people’s faces. I grew before their very eyes. “

“The food was unfailingly good, but what made lunch such a consistent pleasure was the anticipation, knowing that we had the entire afternoon ahead of us and that it might result in anything: Styrofoam boots, a suit made of tape—whatever we could imagine was out there, waiting to be discovered. “

Leviathan

“If a vegan diet truly did cure cancer, don’t you think it would have at least made the front page of the New York Times Science section. “

“Most of the houses that face the ocean are rented out during the high season, and from week to week the people in them come from all over the United States. Houses near the sound, on the other hand, are more commonly owner-occupied. “

“When Hugh returned, I passed on Randy’s suggestion regarding the KitchenAid, and he nodded. ‘While he was here, did you ask him about the leak under the sink. ‘I didn’t know I was supposed to. “

“It was nice, all of us on the same page. Then my father ruined it by asking when I’d last had a physical. “

“It’s nice at night to work puzzles or play board games or just hang out, maybe listening to music. The only one this is difficult for is my father. “

“But he didn’t used to be this nice and agreeable,, I complained to Hugh. Well, he is now, he said. Why can’t you let people change. “

A Modest Proposal

“When it comes to American politics, our roles are reversed. ‘What do you mean ‘Who’s Claire McCaskill. ‘ I’ll say, amazed that I—that anyone, for that matter—could have such an ignorant boyfriend. “

“When my mother called me a queer, my face turned scarlet and I exploded. ‘Me. What are you talking about. Why would you even say a thing like that. “

“While I often dreamed of making a life with another man, I never extended the fantasy to marriage or even to civil partnerships, which became legal in France in 1999, shortly after Hugh and I moved to Paris. “

“It wasn’t until the following day that the reality set in. “

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Why Aren’t You Laughing?

“The view that counts: the ocean we look out at. “

“It takes quite a while to sign your name five thousand times, so I set myself a daily goal and would stop whatever I was doing every two hours and pick up my Magic Marker. Often, while autographing, I’d listen to the radio or watch a TV show I like called Intervention. “

“What the hell. . they say, looking around at their parents, their brothers and sisters, their wives or husbands, all together, seated in a semicircle. “

“I’ll light her cigarette. . No, I will. “

“In the course of my entire life, maybe, but not in one shot. “

The Spirit World

“On the night before Thanksgiving, as I helped her make her bed, she mentioned a friend who’d come to her apartment for dinner the previous evening in New York. ‘He drinks Coke, right, so I went to the store on the corner to buy some,’ she said. “

“The psychic’s voice changed after Mom went away. She sounded tough all of a sudden and started by saying, ‘I really don’t feel like talking to you right now. This is a favor, OK. “

“It’s always ‘Are you a Libra. ‘ but, rather, ‘It’s about time I had a Libra up in here. “

“What troubled me most about Amy’s talk with the psychic was the notion that the dead are unsettled. That they linger. “

“Well, the rest of my family said, it was Tiffany. Don’t be too hard on yourself. We all know how she can be. “

Unbuttoned

“It’s like an airline terminal, he observed. Terminal Illness. “

“So if any of y’all need to turn away. . , the hospice nurse said. “

“It suits you, Hugh observed. “

“I asked Marshall to write Dad’s obituary, but he doesn’t feel up to it, Gretchen said, referring to her boyfriend of nearly thirty years. “

“Still, I’d like to. . apologize. “

“Where. Lisa whispered. Right there, through the window on the ground floor, Hugh told her. “

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